Negative Core Beliefs: Agreeing to Disagree One of the central facets of negative-thinking patterns and Negative Core Beliefs comes not from the negative thought alone, but from our willingness to agree with it. For example, if I find myself uncomfortable and anxious in social situations due to a negative core belief that I will say something stupid or awkward and the people I am engaging with will think that I am indeed an idiot, the…
What is Childhood Trauma and How to Heal I was recently asked what exactly childhood trauma is. What constitutes childhood trauma and how does that trauma impact our lives as adults? While the Wikipedia page on childhood trauma provides an in depth and heavily-referenced treatment on the topic, I found this article from Very Well Minds which discusses the effects of childhood trauma. I believe it offers us a very clear insight into the nature of childhood trauma and…
Searching for Love Outside of Yourself At the core of every individual is the desired for love. At our very foundation, as social beings, is the need to feel a sense of belonging, that we matter. There is no greater sense of purpose or belonging than the security that accompanies our knowing that we are indeed loved. In my years of working with clients, I have witnessed all too often, individuals who believe that if…
Thoughts vs. Emotions: Understanding the Difference Can Make a Difference Two facets of my MaxxMethod approach are thoughts and emotions. At the beginning of working on Personal Development, when asked how we feel, we often respond with a thought.Since many of us have trouble identifying the difference between the two, I thought it would be an important topic. This first step is becoming aware of their difference and how each influences and shapes our lives.…
What the Hell Do We Do with Our Emotions?If you’ve been following my blog, you may have read my “Secret to Healing Our Emotions” a lighthearted article on a serious topic that, unfortunately, carries a ton of stigma. We are often taught to avoid, deflect, and even numb our emotions in self-destructive ways.One of the issues we face when it comes to managing our emotions, particularly the unpleasant ones, is that we approach them with…
The Secret to Healing Our Emotions Have you ever felt like you were going to faint or have a heart attack over a breakup, failed project, or embarrassing memory from the past? A feeling that is so uncomfortable that it is going to suck the life right out of you and literally put you in an early grave?Well, I have some good news: it won’t! Some emotions may bring you to your knees and make…
Taking the Mystery Out of Mindfulness with 3 Easy StepsThere is an excitement all about us. One cannot live in our modern, technologically-advanced age and not take notice of the constant stream of information and the unending list of tasks we must accomplish to ensure our work and personal lives remain on track. It can be overwhelming and is often exhausting.In the midst of this whirlwind of activity and distraction, we seldom take the time…
4 Steps to Changing Negative Core BeliefsOne of the central facets of negative-thinking patterns and negative core beliefs comes not from the negative thought alone, but from our willingness to agree with it. For example, I am amazed at how often my clients consistently believe they’re not good enough. These are people who are often successful in their career, amazing attentive parents, and still do not think they are “good enough.” They’ve adopted this belief…